pirate speech day

Well, blow me down 'n sink me, be it speak like a scurvy pirate day already? I almost forgot 'bout it yet again! 'tis be th' first the hour i managed to catch 'tis jolly day once more. i do't think i be willin' to pass th' chance to act like th' great cap'n Foxy this day. if i don't be seein' ye lunkheadded milk sops shoutin' like a grog-filled scurvy pirate in th' squawk-box underneath, ye be walkin' th' plank come supper! have a ruckas pretendin' to be a jolly band 'o pirates this day, mateys! 'tis scurvy dog gunna be searchin' fer who gunna be me first matey so we can plunder 'n pillage th' nearest port's donut shop for some fresh doughy doubloons! unfortunately i bet none o' ye could rig a bunt gasket 'round the master jigger if yer lives were hangin' in the balance. ye all would be meetin' ol' davy jones 'imself before ye be earnin' yer cut of any loot we be takin' from the nearest port. me trusty sea monster Kirby made a far better band o' mates than any o' ye blunderin' bilge rats could ever be all by herself!